Disko Light

2010-12-19T19:47:00.004+08:00

Didn't expect myself to return back here writing.. I guess this tiny space here has successfully been hidden since everyone thought i only have tumblr. Life hasn't change much during my absence. It pretty much still sucks. I had three sessions of mind-fucking last night alone on the grounds of powerhouse. It drained all of me. My energy, my thoughts, my emotions, everything. Didn't even get a chance to step into the dancefloor after missing from that place for so long.. And the weather decided to further dampen my mood by drizzling throughout the night.

It wasn't the first time i had to deal with girls coming up to me telling me stories. But what surprised me is that i had to get so affected i teared outside the smoking corner in front of every-fucking-one. Then, everything turned drama mama and the rest is history. I can't reveal much but what Bel said to me towards the end of the night definitely made an impact because she is the only one that supports me to hold on..

2010-09-26T02:40:00.005+08:00

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? I'VE MADE A PACT WITH BBY AND I'M GONNA HOUNOR IT FUCK IT ALL. NEVER BELIEVED IN AFTERLIFE BUT ANYWAY HOPE YOU BURN IN HELL.

2010-09-25T14:55:00.005+08:00

I guess last night was the worst day of my life so far. I wouldn't sleep at all, tossing and turning all night. I don't know what's occupying my mind. Gave phuture a miss even thou i was looking forward for so long. So i had to search everywhere for sleeping pills so glad i found the one and only one, down it straight away and coma till 11am this morning. Tried sleeping again in the morning but to no avail. Had no choice, open up the fridge and found a can of Guinness plus a few sticks of fags so yeah... I managed to continue sleeping till 3 and dreamt about you twice. But that's not enough, i don't wanna wake up feeling empty. What should i do now?? Continue sleeping or get something to fill my stomach which was left empty since ytd. Time needs to pass faster... I want a speedy recovery. And, i hope i'll get wasted tonight. Too much pain i am suffering. I need to temporary get rid of them.

Idk which is funnier - me putting up a strong front yet losing my sleep over you or you out partying having fun even thou you said you're sad.

Pretty much the last memories of you.

2010-09-08T22:27:00.004+08:00

Hello everyone............ I'm back. Went to check out my nuffnang since the cheque is taking forever to arrive and i realised my analytic is dropping like crazy. Only 2 visit for one whole day?! haha but doesn't matter i don't really update this space anymore. Super lazy to even on my laptop nowadays, it's like rotting its way in the study room since 6 months ago???? Omg this is insane... I used to spent like what 5 hours on average on my lappy in the past.

Anyway, i'm really really mega bored now. Can't figure out how to explain it exactly yknow just freaking pissed off with everything. Super hungry since i was awake 3 hours ago and mummy had to return home without my cookies!!!! Feelin' for doublecheese burger but macs is soooooo far..... Delivery for one 2bux burger is retarded? My life sucks nowadays. You will never wanna hear my story. Please just let me die leh...... Will i go to hell??

I just discovered a new pimple on my face!!!!!!!!!! My complexion needs to maintain...... Dark circles like freeflow. Why like that? I'm no longer a party animal already why are my dark circles still following me everywhere i go.... Sian half why am i so fugly????!?!?!?! And my hair i need to do something about it i wanna go trim it but no moneyyyyyy. So freaking lazy nowadays i even skipped my facial appointment oh my god i hope i'll be back on track after the holidays. Need to start working hard for once for my last sem in np :(

Hahahaha ok bye. I'm going back to tumblr :D

2010-08-30T12:17:00.001+08:00

Biggest blue black i ever had

Love the way you lie

2010-08-30T11:52:00.004+08:00

Woke up feeling slightly uneasy. I logged into fb as usual and saw something i shouldn't be seeing. There it goes again... I'm trying so hard to not get bothered by all these but to no avail. Days by days i kept lying to myself i thought i'll be able to see the sunlight one day but as the days dragged by the faith i had is slowly fading away. I hate how i have to lie to myself in order to make me feel better each day. The fags not longer works for me. The last time i felt i was truly happy? When was it? I can't even recall. I've started to stop telling people about my problems, my feelings probably because nothing's gonna change. I'll only be whining over the same shitz over and over. What's the point??? The simple assurance i need wasn't given. All i had was....... idk. Nothing. Hate to be stuck in this. My heart just sank alittle when i realised the smile on your face wasn't for me. Why did i bother so hard when i know i'll get nothing after all these. Why? I don't even know why. The moment i see your face, all the pain i experienced will be gone magically. That's how addictive you are.

Sorry this is yet again another emotional post.

2010-08-23T21:23:00.001+08:00

I'm afraid of many things. Most of all, I'm afraid that you'll find someone 10x better than me and forgets all about me.

Rainy Monday

2010-08-16T10:53:00.002+08:00

Hi, i'm left with approximately 3 more hours to go before i land my foot, for the first time after 5 months, in np. Kinda nervous as i felt my palm sweating for the 101th time. My tongue is still swelling and my stomach is growling.. Ppt half-way done and notes yet to be written. Honestly speaking i'm still half awake partly due to the weather outside my window. I need to stay concentrated for the next 3 hours please just let me stay focused.

I'm satisfied with whatever i have now. It may not be the best choice around for me but that's what i've chosen and i'm not going to let it slip off anymore. The doubts i have in me are not exactly at the all time low. That makes it illogical for me to start believing what i'm seeing. But whatever, Taurus is a stubborn bitch.

2010-08-05T15:02:00.003+08:00

I'm not always down and sad. Don't label me as an emo child. I don't seek attentions from strangers I don't need it. I just don't write out the happy moments in my life because I believe once I had too much of it, it'll be gone in no time. Too much experience over such things I'm losing faith in what used to define happiness. I've tried to be strong and I'm proud I didn't shed tears. But ironically, keeping emotions inside of you isn't doing yourself any good either. I'm starting to get used to the heartaching pain I experienced every morning when I get out of my bed, the sleepless nights I spent my thoughts with. I lost my appetite, I lost my smile, I lost my glow but most important, I lost you. I'm glad you came honest with me but the fucking heartaching doesn't go away.. I can't continue any longer the tears in my eyes are gonna fall any moment I need to calm myself down. The office isn't the best place to let your emotions get the better of you.

2010-07-24T11:54:00.002+08:00

Few weeks ago...

2010-07-04T13:40:00.002+08:00

Rise and shine earthlings! I just had my 8 hours of sleep but not feeling very hype up in fact I'm still drained from last night. Every weekend without fail it would be phuture on Friday night and powerhouse on Saturday. Afterwhich the whole of Sunday will be wasted because I'll probably wake up in the late afternoon or even in the evening. I don't feel my weekends like weekends anymore since I'll be more drained out then working during the weekdays.

This weekend is no difference. Friday night was spent over at phuture with a little twist. Most of us stayed outside instead of dancing in the dancefloor. It was quite a mess because so much things happened I have no idea what took place because I was lying on the ground too tired from work. But I actually like it this way. Staying away from the dancefloor wasn't a bad idea right? We can have little talks without having to raise your voice. Listen to music without blasting it into your ear drums. Sit on the floor when your feets gets sore. Spam drinks/fags/food whenever. But then again I still hate alcohol. Hate is a strong word. And yes, I hate it. That's why I only had a cup last night and that was to have a toast with the birthday boy.

The coming weekend will be of no difference I predict. Let's just hope I'm wrong just like how I always take the wrong teams eg. B-R-A-Z-I-L.

Sup Yaw

2010-06-23T23:12:00.006+08:00

Dead city over here. Nothing much to share with you guyz. I assume there are still a few souls quite interested in my life... Anw I can't bare to let it die so a lil update.

Phuture on a Friday night:

Wy was dead drunk credits to Kori. Good job. We spent hours outside Zouk staring at her as she nua all the way... Tried all means to wake her up but to no avail so we decided to raise the white flag and sent her back to her kampong. Thanks uh Frederick. I continued parteying till zouk ends which is 5am after which Ba Ku Teh for brekkie at Mohammed Sultan. Spent hours again waiting for cab. But no, all the cabs decided to mia altogether! Yay. Ended up we gotta call for cabs and home sweet home at 730am. Can what.

Timbre for Kansie's 20th:

Skipped work for a day because i got no feel to drag myself to the office on that particular day. Met up with Bernice & Ranald at np after getting my mc which left me 16bux poorer. Head over to Ranald's house to sleep HAHAHAHA a bit weird but his bed is so comfy!! ^^ then to Timbre for kansie's birthday. Left home early because i gotta work the next day. Sianzzz

Random night at ph:

The most heartbreaking night ever.

Another random night over at ph:

Shelly's back:

Shelly back in sg for a vacation. Had a mini catch up session cum birthday celebration. 2 in 1 combo pack alongside with Celine. She's so cute just like a grown up version of Shelly. We had fun and great deal of laughter over dinner at Marche and sheesha at Nabin's. But i fell asleep for 10 mins in Nabin's because i cannot tahan any longer after which the rest of the time i stone on the floor trying hard to stay awake. Yawn. See you soon Shelly & Celine :)

Ermm, ladies night:

Ladies night at Phuture. Last min decision to join Zak & co over at phuture for pre-birthday celebration for Kansie. I wished her and gave her a hug the moment i saw her and off i went to join Kit's clique for awhile. When i came back she was lying on the cold hard floor, head on Beverly's lap talking loudly to everyone. She is sober. Yeah like totally. Back home at 3am because i'm a loser who has work the next day. I skipped it thou. Blah.

2010-06-17T21:24:00.002+08:00

Dark choco flown over from Swiss with love from Shelly ^^ yum yum.

2010-06-08T20:42:00.007+08:00

MISERABLE
MORNINGS.
NEVERENDING
NIGHTS.

Why can't i get over it? I mean this isn't the first time i'm faced with such a situation. People say you learn from experience. I say i just don't learn my lesson. My world turned 180 degree around. Work has becoming something i looked forward to and friends? One by one i'm getting trouble with. June isn't treating me right and please take a look at the date! It's only the start of the month. I need a break from all these shitz. And i don't mean getting wasted and spent my whole night outside crying my lungs out. Yet, you have zero idea you are the cause. Or maybe you are aware... Anyway, i got pwned right from the start. Well, what else can i expect? Hnd ftw what. Welcome to heartbreak

Day 4 of 4.

2010-06-04T20:55:00.003+08:00

Where is the good in goodbye?

2010-06-03T17:37:00.006+08:00

I'm not updating because my life is a bore. It's all about work - report - eat - sleep - amk. No interesting photos, no story to tell. Ok, maybe just one.

I FELL DOWN THE SLOPE TWICE THIS MORNING. TWO FUCKING TIMES!!

IN FRONT OF EVERYONE WHO WAS WAITING FOR THEIR COMPANY BUS AT 7.10AM. NOTE: MORNING RUSH. EMBARRASSMENT X2.

Hahahahahahaha. I was actually laughing inside me. How much more clumsier can i get. I even tore my leggings. What is wrong w smrt man. They blocked the goddamn stairs that's why i have no choice but to walk down the slopes and in the end fell hard on my knees onto the pavement. I had to train back home with my torn leggings filled with mud. Damn. So i went to the doctor's and she injected me. Orgasm much. No joke. The pain was ........ indescribable. I offically hate her although you gave me tons of bandage and another 2 days mc. Oh ya, i was on mc for two days already. Hehehehehe. I shall throw away that pair of Cotton on shoes later. She deserves to be in the bin for sure!!

kthxbye.

2010-06-01T11:24:00.003+08:00

The worst feeling isn’t being lonely but forgotten by someone you can’t forget.

- I miss you.

Truly Asia

2010-05-24T21:28:00.011+08:00

Road Trip I

I can feel my throat drying, my forehead burning and my nose totally blocked. Woah hot & cold combo! But no, I c.a.n.n.o.t afford to succumb to the evil bacterias yet. I need to finish up my interim report by this week or else i will have to cut my wrist and die of excessive bleeding. Or in a simpler form - commit suicide. It's funny how just a few weeks back i pray and pray i'd fall sick as that i can get an mc and skip work for a day or two. Ironic. However, one thing remains and i'm almost positive it will never ever change. I h8 working! Somebody, Fuck this shit!

Once again, happy birthday to the boys!

2010-05-23T21:13:00.013+08:00

Last friday night over @ Zouk.

I rushed over from Orchard Hotel halfway thru' the dinner that was kinda rude i know. But i really had to escape that place. Everyone was telling the girls to take care of me because i was lobster red from head to toe after a few cups. I had a hard time trying to defend myself. In the end i realised i was fighting a losing battle so i gave up. Zouk was mediocre even after bidding goodbye for such a long long time. It was the clique that made everything better that's all :>

Before i forget yet again, thank you x 1 million for the birthday wishes from everyone. Not to forget the presents and cakes too. Very much appreciated!

2010-05-16T11:59:00.000+08:00

2010-05-08T15:28:00.009+08:00

Oh hi, i am not dead. But perhaps half gone already because internship is sucking dry all my energy every week from Monday to Friday. Why is Monday so far from Friday and Friday so near to Monday? You can never imagine how much i dread each day waking up early for work to face the crazy office politics and random scoldings especially when you're seated beside the boss and opposite the big boss. You eh tahan? Not to mention the horrendous working environment. How i wish August 8 is gonna be tomorrow.

I am so tired. Physically and mentally. I hate meeting new people nowadays. I find it a chore to communicate with them so i always try to avoid mingling with new faces. There is nothing wrong with them, it's me. I am simply too tired to make new friends. Yknow, when you meet a new stranger you have to introduce yourself, where're you from, etc. Then, comes another stranger and you have to repeat the cycle again and again. The ice breaker part is too energy consuming. I AM LAZY TO BREAK THE ICE. Britbrit should organize a tutorial for me. Plus, i'm not acting myself recently. I don't even have the mood for clubbing. I just wanna spend my weekends lying on my bed, reading a book (k, maybe not), watching tv, online......

Whatever it is, i am not complaining. I am not.

2010-04-17T15:14:00.000+08:00

2010-04-15T00:30:00.003+08:00

There are two types of people in this world:

ones that are disappointed in me yet standing by all along and,

ones that are disappointed in me, turned their heads and off they go, away from my life.

To the first group of lovely babies,

I am sincerely apologetic over whatever i have let you down . You know you meant something to me. Each and everyone of you have a little space in my heart you can call home. You may not always be physically there, standing by me, but i know who i can count on through the difficult times i may encounter in the future. Thank you so much for your support all along. No vocabulary can describe how much all of your actions touches my heart. Tonight, no fancy language i shall display but a genuine Thank You from the bottom of my heart.

To the second group of friends,

I have always treated you with utmost respect and have always treasured our friendship. I may not be someone as important to you as you are to me therefore i concluded that might most probably be the reason as to why you chose to gave up on me when you failed to change me. I am confused. Why are you ditching me aside? So i presume you decided to let go of this friend of yours?

Naise

2010-04-10T15:28:00.001+08:00

We need to talk.

2010-04-10T12:00:00.006+08:00

Off your photograph goes out of my wallet. Then I hesitated. I struggled for awhile and in the end I placed it back to where it originally belongs, in the transparent pocket. I'm disappointed. Fucking disappointed. I don't have the slightly idea why are you doing this to me. I have done nothing to deserve the treatment I am receiving now. Did I make you feel ashame or have I pissed you off? Not that I have recalled. It hurts alot when I found out what actually took placed that day. So I pointed my fingers at the wrong victims all these while. I was mad at the wrong person. How could I have thought it was actually you who didn't want me to be there. Not just anyone else but you. Isn't it such a joke? I was laughing at myself when i was told the truth. Laughing at how naive I was when I used to think that you and me could be friends forever. Now that's an awful feeling.

2010-04-05T23:59:00.000+08:00

清明节

2010-04-04T22:03:00.015+08:00

if the world could remain

within a frame

like a printing on a wall,

i think we'd see the beauty and

then stand staring in awe.

2010-03-30T21:37:00.004+08:00

What is wrong with everyone today. She, him, them and you decided to fail me all together on the same day. So i assume i am supposed to be at jp right at this moment but hell no, i'm facing my laptop right now at home feeling like the tiniest creature on earth because i wasn't informed?! Best four? I doubt so. I did tried my best to contact one after another but all i got was "I don't know". Ok fine. I am disappointed that's all. Things have changed i can tell i'm trying to save the situation but too late?

Fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkk.
Angst lil kid now switching tab back to Microsoft word for report.

--------------------
(04.04.10)
my bad.

2010-03-22T19:30:00.004+08:00

i need to chiong report now zzzzzz cough cough

#105

2010-03-15T22:59:00.004+08:00

Oh hi. Today marks an important date in my calendar of history because it's the first day of my muathafucking internship! But it's nothing exciting to anticipate especially after today because i felt cheated into coming over to my company. I was posted to Penjuru (where the hell?!?!??!) instead of the initial promised Batok. Mad angry. In case you have no idea why i am so pissed, Penjuru lane is unfortunately located in an industrial park which somehow resembles Tuas. So basically i'm working in a small office of a huge warehouse. The only way in is by the company bus which departures at 725am daily from je. If you missed it then good game, you gotta take SBS bus and walk in yourself. Good luck because it's gonna be a long journey and who knows you might accidentally get crushed by a container passing by. Good thing is the colleagues there are super friendly but still, how to blend in when i don't even have a desk of my own. I lazy to continue already, i woke up at 530am today hahahah super kiasu need to turn in soon baibai

-------

12.59am

I can't sleepppppppp.

Fail

2010-03-14T23:46:00.004+08:00

Fail photo. Fail hair colour. Fail face. Fail background. Fail pose. FAILZXC BIG TIME.

2010-03-13T02:50:00.016+08:00

It has been a routine since forever for me to anticipate the upcoming of Wed and Sat every week. I can cross my heart and swear to the god i don't like alcohol nor do i like the after effect of it. Yet i see myself gobbling down cup after cup, glass after glass every week regardless of being in or outside the clubs. I am no alcoholic i can assure you but to be honest i cannot find an exact reason to suggest why i find myself there weeks after weeks without fail. It's a question far too many have asked. My answer? I myself would like to know too.

Perhaps it's the ear piercing melody with the help of the alcohol that magically dispersed my trail of thoughts as soon as we hit the dancefloor and at the moment made me feel so light and stress-free. yknow that kinda feeling? It sucks to be me, really. Dancing to the beat of my favourite song has never been such a pleasure. So what is wrong when i decided to escape from being myself for a while? I must admit it's kinda stupid to harbor such thoughts because after the party ended yknow nothing have changed. You are still you. There are still problems awaiting for you to solve. It's true when they said life's a challenge. I'm not backing off but i just need a break sometimes. Everyone do, right? I know how to take care of myself, i really do. I can tell you in your face that i have never and will never get wasted in a club or anywhere else in the public and i am fucking proud of that. I have finally woke up if you know what that means and i assure no more troubles in the future. We are only young once so why not make it a blast and leave no regrets behind because regrets are for losers.

Enough of these, anymore longer would make it look like an essay. So see you party people at ph tmr!

2010-03-06T15:46:00.011+08:00

Supafly was er......alright i guess? We first wasted a few hours outside drinking our Chivas from Holiday Inn hehehe I loike cheap thrills like these! Hit the dance floor for awhile before we retreated to the smoking area because the heat inside is really to the maximum. Then it was the drama mama with the bouncer because of a jacket (???) and pukes everywhere from random strangers and friends. I didn't catch the details because all these happened while i was stoning on the seat and nursing my aching thighs. HAHAH Sounds like a loser blah whatever.

I need to bounce off soon. Wedding dinner later wooooo Think shark's fin. I.CANNOT.WAIT.

One more week to internship....

KILL

PLEASE

favourite skinny boy

2010-03-04T19:52:00.002+08:00

2010-03-03T03:16:00.001+08:00

2010-02-27T16:34:00.010+08:00

i unknowingly set his pix as my screensaver for 2 whole months before i found out it was actually him. i am lovin' my screen saver more than ever now. HAH

2010-02-26T02:00:00.001+08:00

2010-02-25T03:52:00.003+08:00

HAHAHAHAHAHAH @ MY FACE! Should i trim my bangs or let it grow? hai, how i hate making decisions :( oh no, i should really stop distracting myself my bloody paper is 10 hours away....... after which i am finally free oh aye oh yay!! \m/

The authentic photo spam

2010-02-22T21:44:00.007+08:00

YOU CAN FIND EVERYTHING IN FB IF YOU REALISED. HAHAHAHAHA K WHAT DO I WANT TO SAY? HM, I AM VERY SCREWED FOR TODAY'S PAPER AND DEFINITELY TMR'S AND MOST PROLLY ON THURSDAY AS WELL. I FUCK WSS. SAT FASTER COME COME TO ME! AND WHY ISN'T BAYBEE REPLING MY TEXT :(

Yours truly.

2010-02-19T16:37:00.001+08:00

Gone & back

2010-02-16T17:27:00.006+08:00

HUAT AH!!!!

fuckyeahawesome

2010-02-13T16:06:00.002+08:00

2010-02-12T05:28:00.002+08:00

I just don’t know if I wanna do it anymore - get close to somebody so they can leave again.

— One Tree Hill

BMWX171

2010-02-08T11:43:00.001+08:00

equals to:

one free ride.

I'm weird

2010-02-04T15:05:00.009+08:00

I'm getting too stressed up for my own good i reckon. I don't know how i should put it down in words since i suck at writing since young. I always have a problem expressing myself the way i wanted so i usually ended up getting misinterpreted by others 90 per cent of the time. And i didn't realise that until the later part when gossips started spreading like the damn bird flu. This is a serious big big problem! argh i am desperately looking for a cure. So anyway, that's when i learnt to appreciate those who actually understands me because they are like angels who are really hard to come by. Speaking of that, i find myself losing friends slowly one by one yet again. They just magically disappear not the David Copperfield way but yknow we just stopped talking out of a sudden. It's not like we fell out so i don't quite get it... Then came along another type of human being in my life where their middle name is probably liar. How can someone actually lie through their teeth so naturally? I really wonder. Hmmmm, penny for a thought.

On a happier note, meet my little cutie pie i met a few days ago. He's only er... four? He's sooooo adorable he went something like "oh, that's me!" and proceed to point himself on the chest when he saw this photo of him. Awwww such a darling. And he somehow resembles Justin Bieber?? No wonder he's my favourite hehehehe ^^v Yes, Bieber is currently my new obsession. Don't judge me, don't.

!!!!!

2010-02-01T12:53:00.003+08:00

OMFG X10000 I AM HYPERVENTILATING WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT THAT NP HAS A SCHOOL SONG TOO!! WTFWTFWTFWTF @ THE SONG.

Click here to listen + lyrics.

Party girl = no (y)

2010-01-31T21:58:00.002+08:00

why am i always feeling blue?

2010-01-29T00:20:00.004+08:00

No one can claim they know me because i don't either.

2010-01-28T11:50:00.017+08:00

RWS was awesome minus the fact that i overslept after suffering from insomnia for three days (fuck all those stories, mh) as a result i had to hop onto a cab down to vivo... i told the uncle i'm rushing for time yet he still drove like a tortoise and worst, minster cab driver dropped me at the wrong entrance and shortchanged me. How smart.

So..... basically we went touring around RWS on foot like typical tourists and got introduced to the three of four hotels on the island. Pretty unique experience i would say. Hard Rock has no doubt topped my list for its amazing pools. Fucking awesome, you gotta see it to believe it. They even had a man made beach inside the hotel. Awwww, 400bucks/night i need to start saving soon. I can't wait!! But everyone around me is totally against the idea since 400bucks can easily get you a room in Ritz Carlton SIGH HOW???? Most of the boutiques aren't open for public yet and Victoria Secret was a complete disappointment. Moreover, we missed the chance to enter the casino! :(

Not much visuals because it's either my eyesight are failing me or there's really some unknown issues with the lens. The photos didn't turn out to be up to expectation.

Hotel Michael:

Festive Hotel:

Hard Rock Hotel:

Special thanks to jc for the invite, tyvm! (((((((((((:

Mei you ai

2010-01-25T11:15:00.001+08:00

2010-01-24T04:29:00.003+08:00

hello earthlings. Yes i am still wide awake at this unearthly hour, just look at the time now. If this should continue, i would probably die 10 years earlier. Awwww, isn't that pretty sad? But it's okay because i'm munching on my favourite honey baked ham plus slurping my favourite mug rootbeer. That's my kind of life (y)

2010-01-22T12:18:00.001+08:00

I. HATE. MY. FRIZZY. HAIR.

Look over here, ss.

2010-01-21T22:46:00.003+08:00

Bunny is officially my favourite animal :>

2010-01-18T22:39:00.001+08:00

2010-01-17T23:19:00.005+08:00

We had our first and probably also the last mini drinking session over at Merawoods in the name of roach's 19th birthday but apparently he's not with us yesterday. hahahaha so much for celebrating his birthday. well, at least his spirit was with us though (according to him). i bet you enjoyed your trip to xxx yesterday night, dude. hehehe anyway, we had a few drunkards lying everywhere, a sober one running everywhere and an extremely hungry kid munching on burger sitting on the couch almost turning into a potato at the end of the day. Guess who?

Sorry for the quality. You are looking through the lens of an iphone :>

SIGHXZXZC ):

2010-01-16T22:28:00.005+08:00

15jan

16jan

super duper lazy to elaborate what happened. so yeah...

2010-01-13T23:27:00.000+08:00

gloomy days onshore

2010-01-13T22:50:00.005+08:00

repainted my nails few days back. looking at the result, not bad uh.

k, back to my corner to emo -big sigh- ))))))): bai bai.

Spot the difference.

2010-01-11T16:19:00.001+08:00

2010-01-10T17:11:00.001+08:00

Loving someone who can't love you back is like in a comatose. Comfortably lying but unconsciously bleeding and safely sleeping but silently hurting.

2010-01-09T03:29:00.004+08:00

♥♥

2010-01-08T14:48:00.002+08:00

3 Easiest ways to die:

1. Puff a cig daily
you'll die 10 years earlier.

2. Drink alcohol daily
you'll die 30 years earlier.

3. Love someone who doesn't love you back
you'll die daily.

2010-01-07T01:04:00.001+08:00

2010-01-05T02:33:00.002+08:00

hie da jia hao, wo jing tian fa xian wo fei liao. hehehe

wo de lian xian zai hen fei.

2010-01-03T23:37:00.025+08:00

I've been blog hopping as usual these few days over at my sister's and i realised many were talking about what happened over the past year. So i thought it would be interesting for me to write one too. Hehe Probably won't be a duper long post since i am not capable of writing long compositions since young which i have no idea why. The urge to write would just suddenly poof and disappear.

Anyway, my memory is like a 1GB thumb drive. In other words, really lousy so that explains why i can't pretty much recall what exactly happened during the first few months of 2009. Life probably just revolves around school, boyfriend, family and friends. Nothing much exciting or memorable happened i supposed if not it should be able to linger in my memory. Hmmm.

It was only in the later part of the year when things started to go a little haywire...

In June, The Lawn finally closed down after settling in the new location for a year. It was a pretty depressing news for me since it was the best boutique i've ever worked for. I didn't receive the news from my boss, i read it from his Facebook. Pretty weird uh. I haven't found a new job ever since ):

In August, i broke up with Lloyd. Well, i didn't want to write down his name here ever again but oh well, i guess i shouldn't be petty over that. It makes me sound like a loser. I don't wish to explain all over again what exactly took place. I am lazy to do that. You just need to know i used up all the tissues i can find in my house. No joke. Everyone was being nice during that difficult phase especially A, Ss, Yl, Hq, Mh, etc. Not forgetting my family. My sister offered me a her place to stay straight away when i called her randomly one day telling her i was bored. A got me an orea cheesecake when i told her i didn't had anything since the previous night. It was a really hard time. I had to juggle between exams and a breakup at that point. I wonder how he did that because i swear i didn't study more than 25% of what was supposed to be studied.

That aside, as soon as my exams ended, i started to get involved in the clubbing scene. The very first time since i got legal in May. Partying and partying and partying all night long even up till now. That was when i got closer to Wy and eventually she became my clubbing kaki and of course really good friends. Mummy was really upset whenever i'm over at clubs but mummy you should really trust me. I'll take care of myself i promise :> So please stop ganging up with sis to scold me. Tyvm.

Then in September, i lost my daddy forever to some heart related problems. You will never understand how hard it was for me to lose two guys that was once so important to me in my life over such a short span of time. It has been over a hundred days now and i thought i'm finally getting over the grief but no, why are my tearing rolling down my cheeks as i typed? I gotta admit i do miss daddy at times. I can still clearly remember how he looked like when he was lying down in the coffin. Everything was so surreal. From the moment at the hospital, looking at his ice cold body slowing turn from red to pale white then to purple, to the end of the wake, where his body gets cremated and we had to carry his ashes and photo back to the temple while calling his name repeatedly on our way there, i just couldn't believe daddy's gone for real. We've been heading to the temple frequently these few months doing many rituals for daddy. I hope he's doing fine up there in heaven. Oh gosh, i should stop crying now. I don't want to face my classmates with ugly swollen eyes on the first day of school tomorrow.

Moving on,

I felt like i've been losing my friends one by one. Even though i picked up new friends along the way, i didn't forget about every single one of you. You guys should know who you are. I don't know what went wrong. I have been pondering all day for quite some time already. But trust me, i still have no idea what exactly went wrong? ):

I hope 2010 would be nicer to me.

2010-01-02T11:57:00.001+08:00

My new year resolution:

CUT DOWN ON PARTYING.

2010-01-02T05:42:00.001+08:00

10 more hours to 2010...

2009-12-31T12:49:00.001+08:00

People say picture speaks a thousand words.

2009-12-30T16:38:00.003+08:00

2009-12-27T17:11:00.004+08:00

3/4 of my second toe nail is dangling and appears to be coming off anytime soon. It looks really disgusting and worst still, my mum forced me to snip it off myself. FML

2009-12-26T02:46:00.003+08:00

2009-12-24T17:30:00.012+08:00

The crowd at Zouk last night was horrible. We got the bad news even just when we are on the cab a few kilometers away from the destination. From what i heard, almost all the clubs were full house last night. For what? Zz No doubt it will happen again tonight. So no no no to clubs tonight unless we want to experience what we had experienced last night. Where to head to tonight became a real big headache. What a Merry Christmas.

...
......
.........

I went jogging last night/this morning hehe What a way to celebrate Christmas. My thighs are aching like mad now. It's been a long long time since i had experienced this kind of pain. Probably this is an indication that i should start living a much healthier lifestyle. Yknow, i've been out and about almost every night since the holidays started like a week ago, falling asleep only at early morning. My pimples are coming in full force i should better watch out. Wokay, i need to go bathe now but oh no it started raining again. Heavy downpour somemore....... So this should provide me a good excuse to be late later. Hehehe They confirm late also what.

2009-12-23T12:16:00.000+08:00

I wonder how she looks like? Hmmm.

2009-12-21T20:03:00.002+08:00

Look at my abnormal lips.

2009-12-21T17:28:00.001+08:00

"I don’t understand how you can smile all day long but cry yourself to sleep at night. How pictures never change but the people in them do. How your best friend can become your worst enemy or how strange it is when your worst enemy turns into your best friend. How forever turns into a few short months that you’d do almost anything to get back. How you can let go of something you once said you couldn’t live without. How even though you know something is best for you, it hurts just the same. How the people who once wanted to spend every second with you, think a few minutes of their time is too much to spare. How people make promises despite knowing how common it is for promises to be broken. How people can erase you from their lives just because it’s easier than working things out."

Pessimism

2009-12-18T01:46:00.009+08:00

I cannot stand blogs that are filled with post by post of depressing thoughts grumbling to the world almost everything under the sun. But i just realized i am doing the same thing as well. I am born with tragedy in my blood perhaps.

2009-12-17T19:20:00.001+08:00

Ugly Duckling

2009-12-16T00:27:00.005+08:00

The new f21 in 313 is hugeeeeeeee and no doubt they have really cheap accessories. Hehehe. But i am starting to hate town more and more because everywhere i turn, i get to see pretty girls donned in their daintiest outfit strutting down the street like a prom queen. They make me feel so so so inferior about myself ): How to become prettier, anyone? I hate my high cheekbones, they make me look so ugly when i smile. I hate my small eyes, they are barely visible. I hate my chin, they are not sharp at all. I hate my thick lips, i dont want to look like nigga. I hate the fact that my teeth are still not perfect after having braces for 1.5 years. Everything is going wrong. In short, i need to fuck my life.

2009-12-14T13:21:00.010+08:00

Indochine on Friday night. We sort of got lost in Clarke quay because Ian got lousy navigation skills. All of us went from sober to almost seh ka credit to all the games we had. But i'm absolutely sure i woke up for a moment after some random Caucasian lady landed her heels right onto my feet without apologizing. Orgasm much. Spare the details and that's pretty much all i can recall. Just a few photographs i grabbed from Facebook. I need to bathe and head to school for my paper soon. God bless.

and you

2009-12-14T01:47:00.007+08:00

2009-12-12T20:01:00.003+08:00

It was unbelievable, almost like a dream i don't wish to wake up from.

2009-12-11T00:00:00.005+08:00

My classmates are getting more xialan as the days pass by. Why so adorable? You guys can continue okay? HAHAHAHA

I have many random thoughts going through my head a minute ago, but just as i typed http://blogger.com and hit enter, they magically disappeared. Wow, fascinating isn't it? Anyway, today is a great day because i managed to study a tiny weeny bit in the library, after soooo long, before succumbing to Kungfu Panda on my laptop. I told you i had tons of movies in my laptop. That movie is the shiat. Hehehe can i have a pet panda please. By the way, my niece actually thought Panda and Polar bear are the same animal. She saw the Polar bear in the Zoo the other day and confidently told my sis eh the Panda become white liao leh. HAHAHAHAHAHA JOKE OF THE DAY. I couldn't stop laughing and the hot ang moh next to me was chuckling too i swear.

Okay, back to the notes for now. I have to make sure i better pass tmr if not i cannot get my dpp cert. Argh.

2009-12-09T23:59:00.001+08:00

We sneaked into your house, got into your bedroom. Got you a cheesecake with strawberries falling everywhere. Start chatting with your mummy. Got your daddy to be on our team. A false alarm. Ditched lighter for matchsticks. Tried to hide but the taped switched gave us away. Sang you a Birthday song. We began munching on the cake. You started searching everywhere for your elephant. Your classmates came. Your mummy served us yet another cheesecake. What else did i missed out? oh yes, yl broke your chair. HAHAHAHA. Happy birthday breast flend ♥

2009-12-09T02:00:00.002+08:00

HAPPY EIGHTEEN BIRTHDAY ON-DREA ♥♥♥

2009-12-07T15:53:00.002+08:00

2009-12-06T01:58:00.008+08:00

HAHAHAHAHA GO JOIN EVERYONE!!

Waiting for nothing?

2009-12-04T20:33:00.012+08:00

I am staying at home on a Friday night because i am an unwanted kid. Can you picture my grumpy face? I noticed almost everyone is turning mean nowadays. Or maybe should i say just towards me. I might still flash a smile at you after you murmured what actually is kind of hurting in my face. But that's not because i am afraid of you nor am i a two-faced snake, i just don't want to pick up a fight. Pretty dumb to quarrel over such things especially when it is coming out of your mouth since you doesn't really matters to me.

I have quite a few tasks on hand to do over the weekend. Most of them concerning bout school. Should i be glad and thank god? For at least i won't be staring at my laptop screen, thinking which website should i visit like what i usually do. But it's also a turnoff to realise that what's lying in waiting for me is doing qns for Smkt and edit the slides, writing notes and start mugging for upcoming Itm test. What's new?

For the first time in many weeks, i do not look forward to the weekends.

Before & After

2009-12-03T19:20:00.014+08:00

NICE OR NOT?

2009-12-03T14:03:00.002+08:00

2009-12-03T13:59:00.002+08:00

Best cartoon ever.

2009-12-02T18:59:00.002+08:00

2009-12-02T17:25:00.001+08:00

2009-12-02T16:37:00.003+08:00

I found out, there's no such thing as a miracle

School

2009-12-01T00:37:00.005+08:00

One more month to New year.

Two more weeks to Common test.

Three more days to SMKT test.

Four more days to ITM submission deadline.

Afterwhich, needless to say, time to rock n roll babies.

2009-11-29T03:44:00.004+08:00

@3:45

Trying to start working for ITM but... hehe

2009-11-29T02:19:00.005+08:00

After Ninja Assassin, I realised..

2009-11-28T04:12:00.005+08:00

RAIN. IS. SIZZLING. HOT.

2009-11-26T15:43:00.000+08:00

Heavy heart

2009-11-26T10:57:00.004+08:00

The kids came to stay over again.

2009-11-26T01:44:00.003+08:00

No matter what, you will still be my friend. I am pretty sure you know it too. However, there are bound to be times where conflicts arise. Even couples quarrel. So i see no reason why people should get worked up by the post below. You mean i can't even rant on my own blog? Maybe i should consider buying a diary instead. Yes, i was angry. But now, everything is all right. I am not trying to be mean or hurt you in any way. I just need to vent out my anger somewhere. I am sure more than one person is affected by that post, of which i have no idea why, nevertheless those who are affected should stop feeling affected. You know who you are. I am exhausted. All the dramas should come to an end by now.